Frontier Former Editor

March 26, 2011

And then we’ll order some traps from the Acme Corporation . . .

Carlos Lam – the new Alfred Naujocks?

Not to be confused with Robert Lam of Chicago Transit Authority

Carlos Lam, plotter not-so-extraordinaire

  Mr Lam – until Friday, a deputy prosecutor for Johnson County, Indiana but still presumably an admirer of whiteshirt Republican Governor Scott Walker of  Wisconsin – apparently thought that Nazi Germany came up with a few good ideas in the late summer of 1939. Like using deception and staged violence to defame enemies domestic and foreign. Maybe Lam was surfing the web and found something really obscene, like the Gleiwitz incident.

'It'll be better than Arbitron, mein Fuhrer!'

Not-much-better plotter Alfred Naujocks

Lam, in what he probably thought was a fit of brilliance, committed his thoughts to email. An email with his username and part of the official email system of the Johnson County, Indiana prosecutor’s office.

And, thus, the official records of that system begat this:

“If you could employ an associate who pretends to be sympathetic to the unions’ cause to physically attack you (or even use a firearm against you), you could discredit the unions,” the email said.

“Currently, the media is painting the union protest as a democratic uprising and failing to mention the role of the DNC and umbrella union organizations in the protest. Employing a false flag operation would assist in undercutting any support that the media may be creating in favor of the unions. God bless, Carlos F. Lam.”

Let’s see . . . in 1939, SS-Obergruppenfuhrer Reinhard Heydrich, Gestapo chief Heinrich Mueller and SS Major Alfred Naujocks cooked up a similar plot in which concentration camp prisoners would be dressed in Polish uniforms and killed at the site of a German radio station to prove that the Poles were aggressors against the peace-loving German state.

I wonder if Lam deleted something from his email. Say, something like . . . . “Walker, mein leader, perhaps you could get some cheap clothing and weapons, requisition a few Wisconsin Department of Corrections inmates, make them change their clothes and let them ‘loose’ on the grounds of the governor’s chancellery . . . . your stadtpolizei would become heroes and collective bargaining for public employees could be reined in by a final resolution . . . .”

And for added interest, Mr. Lam seems to envision himself a prophet of race relations in the United States (here).

“This book is an excellent prediction of what is to come in the next century. Not only are black and hispanic militancy on the rise, but White movements are gaining adherents daily, probably in response to the crimes perpetrated against Whites by these other races. Mr. Chittum’s predictions are also backed up with statistics, and he also shows that past multiethnic empires have broken up. Read it and prepare.”

I feel so inadequate. My best effort on Amazon’s book reviews was only this.

I suppose it could have been worse. Lam could have gotten a copy of ‘The Protocols of the Elders of Zion.’

But all of this still leaves a question unanswered. What passes for brains among some segments of the GOP in the north central U.S.? I have one theory . . . .

Well, it is brain matter . . .

The synapses are probably more active in this too . . .

February 2, 2010

More reasons why Walmart must be eliminated from the face of the earth

Conversation between me and a Walmart employee about two weeks ago, between snows . . .

Me to Walmart employee: “Do you have any snow shovels?”

Walmart employee: “We’re out.”

Me: “Are you geting any more in?”

Walmart employee: “No. They’re a seasonal item.”

Me: “But it’s still winter for a month and a half.”

Walmart employee: “There’s no demand for them after winter.”

At this point, there are two responses roiling in my mind . . .

Me, talking in my mind: “You f***ing moron, it’s still winter!”

Me, opening my mouth: “Never mind.”

April 13, 2009

It’s official: The new “Talk Like a Pirate Day” tagline is . . .

Filed under: cool stuff, crime, doomed to repeat, dumbasses, fun stuff, humor, scumbags — Frontier Former Editor @ 10:58 pm

Arrrrr . . . . thump

Actually, I did have a picture of me . . .

Filed under: dumbasses, humor — Tags: , , — Frontier Former Editor @ 10:34 pm

and the dog probably would have done a better job of it:

dscn0153

March 17, 2009

Here’s another reason to major in history, or at least read it more than once every few years . . .

The Credit Mobilier scandal of 1872 – a good reason to hold big business’ s and elected government’s collective feet to the fire on a regular basis.

“Crédit Mobilier of America was formed by George Francis Train, the vice-president in charge of publicity for the Union Pacific Railroad. Crédit Mobilier of America was designed to limit the liability of stockholders and maximize profits from construction with the hefty fees being paid by federal subsidies. The company also gave cheap shares of stock to members of Congress who agreed to support additional funding  . . .

“It was claimed that the $72 million in contracts had been given to Crédit Mobilier for building a rail only worth $53 million. Union Pacific and other investors were left nearly bankrupt.”

Okay folks, and that was 57 years before the 1929 crash. Dubya, let’s go over the success of the “No Child Left Behind Act” again, shall we?

March 15, 2009

Cry me a river, you neo-fascist turd

Dick Cheney is aggrieved because Dubya didn’t pardon his familiar:

“I was clearly not happy that we, in effect, left Scooter sort of hanging in the wind,” Cheney said in an interview on CNN’s “State of the Union with John King.” He acknowledged a “fundamental difference of opinion” with Bush on the matter.

A federal jury in Washington convicted Libby of lying and obstructing an investigation into who blew the cover of CIA officer Valerie Plame, whose husband, former Ambassador Joseph Wilson, had criticized the Iraq war.

Bush earlier commuted Libby’s 2-1/2-year prison sentence but before leaving office in January, Bush refused to give Libby an outright pardon.

Cheney said Libby had been unjustly accused and deserved a pardon but Bush disagreed. It was one of the few areas that Cheney has publicly said he disagreed with Bush on during their eight years in the White House.

I’ve made my opinion of Dick Cheney clear in this blog many a time – from his term as Secretary of Defense to the last eight years of a neo-fascist pall over this country. But now, I truly think he is this country’s Beria or Feliks Dzerzhinskiy, or even a low-rent Himmler.

Please, Cheney, find yourself a lair with some self-destructive mountain militia.

March 13, 2009

Where have you gone, Louis Rukeyser? Our nation holds its lonely eyes to you . .

If anyone ever questions or trivializes the role of satire and humor in society, they should remember this 10-minute segment.

Especially in a time where Citibank is hosting conference calls – on our tax dime – to encourage union-busting and who-knows-what-else.

What Stewart did is in the best tradition of Petroleum V. Nasby, Herblock, Samuel Clemens, Mort Sahl, George Carlin, Tom Lehrer and hosts of other humorists – ridicule, embarass, shame, humiliate and destroy anything that would prey upon society.

This society needs a huge sweep to remind ‘big business,’ ‘Wall Street,’ and every other over-dominant segment of the American business and political scene that acting like Charles Keating did in the  years leading up the the savings and loan scandals of the 1980s may not be child molestation but is just about as legally and morally defensible as being a child molester.

And while we’re at it on a bleak Friday afternoon, please allow Rush Limbaugh to continue broadcasting and expressing his opinion. Part of a free society is having the right to express one’s opinions and having the responsibility to defend the logic and rationality of those opinions.

And please allow Republican National Committee Chairman Michael Steele the right to express his political views for the same reason – even if he lacks the intellectual weight to generate rational policy and philosophical positions.

By the way – even Louis Rukeyser got caught violating federal trading rules, so be thankful, Jim Cramer. Be very, very thankful.

February 22, 2009

Army strong-arm?

Having grown up as a military dependent and now working in a profession where I see how the economy is wreaking havoc on soldiers, sailors, airmen, Marines and Coast Guarsdmen, I’ve always been a firm believer in giving military personnel and their families needed aid and comfort. Consistently, they face one of the crappiest professional and home enviroments found in American society, and we ask them to do it at a mere pittance while bankers, entertainers and sports figures drain wealth far in excess of their usefulness to society.

I’ve seen how that aid and comfort has been provided over the years, from service relief organizations to the firm yet fatherly guidance of a senior NCO  for a wayward soldier or sailor. But this bit of news is something that our new National Command Authority might want to consider tending to in short order:

Between 2003 and 2007 — as many military families dealt with long war deployments and increased numbers of home foreclosures — Army Emergency Relief grew into a $345 million behemoth. During those years, the charity packed away $117 million into its own reserves while spending just $64 million on direct aid, according to an AP analysis of its tax records.

Tax-exempt and legally separate from the military, AER projects a facade of independence but really operates under close Army control. The massive nonprofit — funded predominantly by troops — allows superiors to squeeze soldiers for contributions; forces struggling soldiers to repay loans — sometimes delaying transfers and promotions; and too often violates its own rules by rewarding donors, such as giving free passes from physical training, the AP found.

Granted, you can’t run a military like it was a democracy. But a democracy certainly can impose some core values conducive to discipline, good order and humaneness toward the troops.

January 19, 2009

Like the two French diplomats reportedly said at Compiegne in May 1940 . . .

“A relief.”

“Yes, like crapping your pants.”

That should sum up George W. Bush’s departure tomorrow. I wouldn’t care if the inauguration was the Second Coming along with a burning bush, the parting of the Potomac, tastefully-done pillars of salt, Maccabees, Purim and Genesis (not with Phil Collins): George W. Bush has left this country with a vast landscape of scorched philosophical, spiritual and physical earth. In my darkest corner of my heart, I find more good in Richard Nixon’s evil persona than in Bush’s good old boy emptiness.

I hope Obama can start to bring the ship of state around to a calmer, more rational course, but it’s going to be awfully hard given what Bush and his puppeteers have left for us.

Not to mention what we allowed the stupid bastard to do and be conned into doing. Maybe he can stay locked in his now-gated community and start reading Tom Clancy as fact.

Please, George, please don’t let the door hit you in the ass Tuesday.

January 15, 2009

Even better than a ‘Simpsons’ rerun!

Our soon-to-be-ex-president makes a live speech to family and friends at 8 p.m. Eastern time. Guess he needed a sympathetic laugh track .

Just the other day, MSNBC ran parts of his press conference in defense of his presidency. The national lack-of-command-of-his-faculties authority defended the federal response to hurricane Katrina, noting that 30,000 New Orleans residents were rescued from their rooftops.

Let’s see. Thirty thousand people recovered from rooftops, as opposed to evacuating them – and thousands of others stranded in the city – before the hurricane. That doesn’t sanctify the federal response. It does, however, speak volumes of the courage of hundreds of military helicopter aircrew who risked their lives to rescue the victims of criminally stupid municipal, state and federal government officials.

Enjoy your speech, Dubya. If there was any justice on January 20, you’d get nothing more than a car ride to the train station so you could buy your own train ticket home.

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