Frontier Former Editor

February 21, 2008

The Guns of February

Filed under: Barbara Tuchman, doomed to repeat, dumbasses, Kosovo, Russia, Serbia, societal niceties, U.S. Embassy — Frontier Former Editor @ 4:21 pm

If Barbara Tuchman were alive, she’d be shaking her head in familiar disgust.

 Downtown Thursday Night in Belgrade

 Being a history major, I see absolutely perfect sense in today’s happenings. It makes perfect sense in the same way that it makes sense that serial killers kill, child molesters love Halloween and neighborhood parks, and that World War One was merely a precedent and not the war to end all wars.

Just about every cultural segment that was once Yugoslavia has more than its share of blame in the centuries of bloodshed that preceded the region’s inclusion in the Austro-Hungarian empire and eventual ‘unification’ under Tito.

Even Tito realized that unifying Yugoslavia was an exercise in threats, cajolery and bribery. No wonder that his death was like tripping 10,000 dominoes.

Like all of this background excused the horses**t Serbia tried to pull in the 1990s and after 2000. I don’t think it’s culturally insensitive at all to call that remainder of a nation a collective group of violent, sociopathic, murderous, special education students.

And despite whatever historic guilt that Kosovars might ever be accused of, Serbia started it in the 1990s and Russia is guiltier than hell of aiding and abetting it.

You’d think that Soviet and Russian leaders might have learned something from August 1914. Maybe they have – it’s a great place to stump up and start unholy hell. Yeah, maybe Russia has endured centuries of threats and invasion from the west. Maybe they feel threatened because the various eastern and central Europeans they tried to enslave have made it clear that they are sick of it.

And maybe Russia needs to be reminded of Katyn Forest before it goes on about how the West is threatening Mother Rus’s existence.

The one thing I’ve found lacking in today’s news coverage is translation of what the Orthodox Church has been saying about all this except for brief mentions of prayer services for Kosovo’s peaceful retention in Serbia.

If the Yugoslavian/Serbian Orthodox Church’s official line is that Kosovo remain in Mother Serbia, then that’s the best argument I’ve ever seen for separation of church and state. After all, the Russian Orthodox Church kissed the czars’ asses and ‘encouraged’ Russians to submit to the czars’ various whims.

I truly hope that the Serbian Orthodox Church learned something useful in the 20th century.

As for Russia? Russia is behaving exactly like Russia, except that this time they actually have foreign currency reserves sufficient to allow Russian and former Soviet leaders to be they cheap thugs they’ve always aspired to be.

I hope that we certainly show the sense not to allow those scumbags to draw us and the world into another 1914. On the other hand, I hope we develop the sophistication to let the Russians know quietly and coldly how much fun they could have with a return to the good old days of 1917.


  1. I think ten years ago I saw a comedian utter the line “Balkans Balkanize. Film at eleven.” It has been ever thus.

    Comment by raincoaster — February 26, 2008 @ 4:05 am

  2. He was late on that one . . . by about 15 centuries.

    Comment by Frontier Former Editor — February 26, 2008 @ 9:06 am

  3. Oy! Where’s my substantial comment outlining the tragic consequences of letting Tito, LaToya, Marlon or any other Jackson run a country?

    My question is why the hell id everybody ove there so f*#%king tall now? Did the Ruskies pour a little ‘Chernobyl Heavy’ into the water supply or what?

    I’ll have to keep my eye on this WordPress…

    Comment by homey — February 26, 2008 @ 3:32 pm

  4. speaking of WordPress..
    ooh lookee here…
    my old wordpress avatar still comes up…

    Geezus let it go!

    Comment by homey — February 26, 2008 @ 3:35 pm

  5. What if I changed my name & avatar info…

    Comment by escapeon — February 27, 2008 @ 2:30 pm

  6. NOPE!

    Comment by escapeon — February 27, 2008 @ 2:31 pm

  7. Just stopping by to say hola! 🙂

    Comment by azahar — February 27, 2008 @ 5:13 pm

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